After the Storm
by LuxEtVeritas10
Summary: Emily Prentiss and Jennifer Jareau are set to return to the BAU.  But first they each must overcome what has happened in the past, and admit their true feelings.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This story is my vision for the return of the Emily Prentiss and Jennifer Jareau characters to Criminal Minds. The story is femslash in nature and will be six chapters long. The frequency with which I upload new chapters will depend on reader feedback. I hope you enjoy it.**

**AFTER THE STORM**

CHAPTER ONE

_And after the storm,_

_I run and run as the rains come._

_And I look up, I look up,_

_on my knees and out of luck,_

_I look up._

The AVE high speed train gradually came to a stop at the Madrid Atocha, having made the 628 km trip from Barcelona in just under three hours. In the first class car, a large, burly man stood from his seat. He wore dark sunglasses in an attempt to disguise exactly where his gaze fell, but the movement of his head made it clear he was surveying his surroundings. The front of the car. Clear. The rear of the car. Clear. The other passengers. Clear. Stepping into the aisle, the man silently nodded to his companion, the row's window seat occupant. The second man was older and of a slighter build but the way with which he carried himself made it clear that of the two men, he was the one in charge, the one to be feared.

The two men made their way to the car's forward exit, the larger man in a constant state of awareness. As they stepped onto the train station platform, a third man, still on the train, carefully folded the newspaper he had been reading before tucking it into the pocket of the seatback in front of him. He also had been in the first class car, seated in the last row. Without a glance towards the front of the car, the passenger slung his backpack over his shoulder and made his way to the car's rear exit.

The train station was crowded with tourists on holiday. The man with the backpack put on sunglasses and a gray ballcap. In jeans and a t-shirt, he easily could have passed for any of the other tourists, which was his intention. He made his way through the crowd, keeping a safe distance between him and his targets. Exiting the platforms, the two forward leading men began walking east before crossing the busy Calle de Mendez Alvaro and disappearing down a side street.

The man in the ballcap quickly followed, still being careful to maintain a large enough distance so as not to arouse any suspicion. The side street was not nearly as busy as the station but there still were enough people and activity to allow him to not stand out. The sun gradually was descending on the horizon, as night approached, forcing him to remove his sunglasses. He followed the men for a few minutes, before they turned down an alley. He continued walking, past where they had turned, before quickly darting down the next alley. The alley was narrow and poorly lit and seemed to be about a hundred yards in length. Realizing this was his chance, he removed his hat and ran the entire length as fast as he could before crouching down in the shadows.

He slid his backpack off his shoulder and reached inside, removing a Glock handgun. He could hear the footsteps of the two men in the next alley over. He discarded the backpack on the ground and slowly emerged from the shadows before silently making his way towards them. When he reached the exit to their alley, he stepped out of sight. From his position, he knew he'd have the advantage on both men when they came through the opening.

As he waited, calculating his moves in his head, it suddenly occurred to him that their footsteps had stopped. He held his breath, straining to hear any indication of what their movements were. Hearing nothing, he slowly leaned forward and darted a glance down the alley. Nothing. Quickly deciding what to do next, he squared up and stepped into the opening, his weapon raised. The alley was completely deserted. Confused and with all senses heightened, he cautiously took a step forward, moving his gun from left to right.

A noise behind him captured his attention and he quickly spun around. But it was too late. Despite his size and athleticism, he was no match for the burly man, who now held his arms above his head, his gun lying useless on the ground.

"Agent Derek Morgan of the FBI," came a voice from the shadows. As the man behind the voice stepped from the darkness, he lit a match and raised it to the cigar in his mouth. The man inhaled as the light of the match touched the end of the cigar, causing it to glow. Shaking out the match with one hand while removing the cigar and exhaling the smoke before continuing, "I thought that was you on the train. What could you possibly be doing in Spain? I hope it's not because you're looking for me."

Taking the silence from the subdued man as the only answer he needed, Ian Doyle smiled, "Ah, it _is_ because of me. I truly am flattered, but I'm afraid you're wasting your time." He took another puff of the cigar while pacing in front of the FBI agent a few times. "Hmm, what am I going to do with you?"

"You better just kill me because I'm not going to stop until I'm dead or you are."

The Irish mobster stopped and looked at the agent. "That's interesting. Because based on your current situation, I think I know which one of those it will be." There were a few moments of silence while Doyle seemed to be considering something. "You know, if you're looking for someone to blame, your energy is better directed at Lauren or Emily or whatever her real name was and not on me."

This caused Morgan, who up until now had been trying to save his strength, to visibly strain against the bigger man, trying to breaking free. But it was to no avail, the big man seemed able to restrain him with ease. Doyle laughed, "I see you disagree with this, yes?"

"Emily was a good person, she didn't deserve to die."

The smile on Doyle's face quickly vanished. He took a hard step towards the FBI agent, as if to strike him. "Emily deserved exactly what she got. That bitch took from me the only two people I ever cared about." Doyle hadn't intended to say this and it was a mistake Morgan quickly picked up on, being an expert profiler.

"Two people? Oh, I see. This was never just about your son. This was about Lauren, too." Doyle pretended to ignore him so he pushed further. "You didn't deserve either of them. They both were better off without you." With this, Doyle removed his concealed weapon and took a step towards the profiler, raising the barrel.

Surprisingly, he didn't pull the trigger. Instead, after a moment he collected himself and took a step back. "Agent Morgan, you're right. I do need to kill you." Taking another step back, he continued, "but not here. I am going to enjoy this one since you deprived me of enjoying Emily's death." Turning his gaze to the man holding Morgan, he commanded "Scotty, go get the car. I've got Agent Morgan here under control." Scotty released Morgan and went back the way the men had come, his heavy footsteps echoing.

Morgan sized up the situation, trying to figure out a way to gain the upper hand on Doyle. Predictably, the Irishman knew this was what he was thinking. He made a tsk tsk noise while shaking his head. "Agent Morgan, I really hope you don't force me to shoot you here."

Morgan raised both his hands but before he could respond, a sound behind him got both of their attention. Mindful that Doyle was pointing a gun at him, he only turned his head to look over his shoulder.

"Scotty?"

Sensing his opportunity, Morgan glanced at the other man, not moving his head. Without hesitation, he lunged forward, reaching for the gun. Doyle was caught off balance sending both men tumbling towards the ground. As they fell to the hard asphalt, Morgan's head connected with the rough surface.

Dazed, but not unconscious, the FBI agent rolled over and tried to stand, knowing he needed to find Doyle's gun before the mobster did. With his head injury, he was unable to get to his feet and resorted to crawling on his hands and knees. He didn't know where Doyle was but he assumed he was too busy dealing with an injury of his own. The unmistakable sound of the hammer of a gun being cocked behind him let him know he was wrong.

On his knees, Morgan turned towards the sound, his hands raised. Doyle stood ten feet from him, his gun pointed directly at Morgan's face. Wiping a bit of blood from his own mouth, Doyle spoke, "I'm sorry Agent Morgan, but you've left me no choice."

A single gun shot rang out, the noise reverberating the entire length of the alley. Doyle stumbled forward, clutching his shoulder of the arm that had been holding the gun that Doyle now released from his grasp. He leaned heavily against a dumpster before slowly sliding down the front of it and sitting on the ground, only a few feet from Morgan.

Still on his knees and still recovering from his head injury, Morgan was having difficulty making sense of the situation. As he looked to where the bullet had come from, a figure slowly stepped into the light, gun first, then hand, arm, body, and finally, a face. Morgan was speechless.

Which is why Doyle was the first to speak, still clutching his wounded shoulder, his eyes wide. "Impossible. I killed you, you're dead."

Her gun unwaveringly still pointed at Doyle, Emily Prentiss took a step towards him.

"Aww, I missed you, too, sweetheart." Her voice was so cold and callous, Morgan never would have believed it was Emily Prentiss speaking if he weren't looking right at her. "Emily?"

Prentiss switched her gaze, but not her gun, from Doyle to Morgan, her demeanor immediately changing. "Derek, are you okay?" Her voice had softened considerably, taking on a tone of concern for her friend.

"Yeah, I think so... but... how?" Morgan still hadn't yet risen to his feet, but he wasn't sure if it was because of his head injury or the shock of seeing his previously dead, now very much alive fellow profiler.

"Morgan, I'll explain later. I just need you to trust me right now, okay?" Emily's focus was still on Morgan, so she didn't notice as Doyle took advantage of her shift in attention and slowly reached towards his gun with his good arm. His fingers grasped the cold metal, lifting the handle into his palm. In one quick motion, he raised the gun and fired at the brunette in front of him.

In his haste, he wasn't able to aim properly, and his shot went wide, although it was enough to make Prentiss lose her composure. Doyle steadied his grasp on the gun and leveled it directly at his former lover. He wasn't going to miss this time.

But the Irishman was dead before his finger had a chance to even touch the trigger. As soon as Doyle's first shot had rang out, Morgan had gone into reflex mode. Without hesitation, he had reached towards his left ankle, removed his back up weapon, and eliminated the target. He remained kneeling, one knee up, one knee against the asphalt, both hands holding the gun still trained on Doyle. Seeing the dead stare of the other man's eyes, he finally lowered his weapon and got to his feet.

Emily slowly stepped up next to him and kept walking until she was standing directly over Doyle. She raised her gun and tried to pull the trigger, but her gun jammed. Frustrated and cursing under her breath, she began desperately tugging at the weapon, accomplishing nothing towards fixing the jam, but taking out her aggression all the same.

Morgan stepped forward and placed one hand on her shoulder, one hand on the gun, removing it from her grasp. His voice was gentle, "Emily, it's over."

Emily looked at Derek, her eyes wild. For a brief moment he thought she might begin to cry or maybe even collapse. But the look was gone in an instant. The brunette stiffened, pushing up her shoulders. The emotion was gone from her voice again. "Let's go home, Derek."


	2. Chapter 2

**AFTER THE STORM**

CHAPTER TWO

_Night has always pushed up day,_

_you must know life to see decay._

_But I won't rot, I won't rot,_

_not this mind and not this heart,_

_I won't rot._

Jennifer Jareau, known to most simply as JJ, lay wide awake, staring at her ceiling, as she had been for the past thirty minutes. In that time the sun had broken the horizon and was slowly making its ascent over northeastern Virginia, inviting everything it touched to come alive. Each minute that ticked by manipulated the shadows on her ceiling, creating an evolving canvas of slowly emerging patterns. It had been a restless night, as evidenced by the way in which her comforter and pillows were strewn about the bed. Her mind, anxious for the morning to come sooner, had been unable to yield to sleep. Her bedside alarm clock sounded, signifying it was now an appropriate time to rise. A quick tap of a button silenced the alarm.

JJ rose and made her way down to her kitchen to start her morning routine, which always began and ended with coffee. As the liquid began to brew, filling the house with it's sweet aroma, JJ returned to her room. Step two: shower. As she entered her bathroom, she stopped to look in the mirror over her sink. She smiled at her reflection. If one hadn't known she had spent the entire night tossing and turning, they never would have guessed it. The woman staring back at her looked refreshed, relieved... happy. Today, JJ was going home. To her family.

After a year at the Pentagon, JJ finally had been granted permission to return to the BAU. She couldn't imagine the strings Rossi must have had to pull, the favors he must have had to call in. But he had done it and now she was preparing for her first day back. Back to what though? The past year had seen a lot of changes, both for JJ and for the BAU.

At first JJ had been disillusioned with her new work for the Department of Defense, discouraged by the revelation that she and the rest of her peers were simply pawns for the true shot-callers, the Erin Strausses and above of the world. She also had difficulty adjusting to her new environment. If the BAU had been testosterone heavy, the Pentagon was morbidly obese. But she had persevered, fighting tooth and nail for every opinion to be heard, to be taken seriously by men who didn't begin to respect her, let alone recognize she just may be talented at her job. Gradually, she had carved out her spot but it had hardened her along the way. But maybe the damage was reversible. If she had been removed from the kiln before her new form had been allowed to set, then perhaps there was still hope for her. Otherwise, the only option meant shattering into countless pieces, some of which were sure to get lost in the process of being put back together. Only time would tell which destiny lay ahead for JJ.

And the BAU itself was not exempt from change.

The BAU JJ had left a mere one year ago was not the same as the one she was returning to. The changes ranged from the top of the heirarchy, with Unit Chief Strauss's extended personal leave, for reasons unknown, to the very bottom, with the addition of Ashley Seaver, a young cadet who had only recently graduated from the Academy. And somewhere in the middle was the void left by Emily Prentiss, the profiler dead to everyone but JJ and Hotch. JJ stoically carried the weight of her knowledge, knowing no matter what burden it had imposed on her, it was nothing compared to what Emily had given up to protect the team.

Pulling up to the security checkpoint at the entrance to the FBI's parking garage, JJ reached for her FBI credentials. She paused to look at the item in her hand. Her transfer from the Pentagon to the FBI meant a new BAU badge and a new badge meant a new picture. Her old badge in mind, she made a mental tally of the differences between it and this new one. The familiar azure eyes stared back at her, bright as ever, but gone was the wide, carefree smile of her past. In its place was an expression that gave away nothing, save the slightest upturn at the edges of her lips. The hint of hope, wanting to return. The new JJ.

She quickly swiped her badge, waiting for the mechanical arm to raise, before entering the garage. The sense of deja vu and nostalgia was almost overwhelming as she entered the lobby of the FBI's headquarters. She took a moment to look around and take in the familiar sights and sounds of her home that once was and now was again. Not wanting to be mistaken for a rookie, she continued on, expertly navigating her way to the elevator corridor. With each ping of the elevator passing another floor on its ascent, so too she felt her excitement level rise. Her return was to be a surprise to the rest of the team, her transfer having been completed behind closed doors. Today was perfect timing for her to rejoin the unit, as the rest of the team had been ordered mandatory leave for the past two weeks and were set to return today. Each person was supposed to be assessing their career aspirations and commitment to the unit, but JJ knew better than to entertain that any of them would actually ever leave the BAU.

As the elevator reached her floor, JJ exited the car, briefcase in hand. She loved arriving this early, seeing the bullpen quiet and empty. The calm before the storm. She headed towards her office, wanting to spend the next hour getting settled before the meeting Hotch had called at 7:30. The fact that the door was closed and the lights off was comforting to her, as if it was just as she left it, waiting all this time for her to return. She entered her office, immediately noting the empty desk and cabinet space. She laughed to herself, knowing it wouldn't stay like that for long. As she walked behind her desk, a sudden high-pitched shriek from the doorway caused her to jump.

"Ah, rotten! I was hoping to have your first cup of coffee waiting for you but I should have known you'd come in early on your first day back!" Garcia stood in the doorway to JJ's office, a look of pure elation on her face, two cups of steaming coffee in her hands.

"And here, I thought my return to the team was a surprise." Seeing the hurt flash across her best friend's face, JJ quickly added, "but _I_ should known better."

"Oh my sweet, naive snowflake. There is nothing that goes on at Quan-tee-co that I don't know about." Somehow JJ believed her.

A silence came over the room, as both became aware of what JJ's return signified. Of all the difficult changes the BAU had undergone in the past year, something was finally going right. "So, about that coffee..."

That was all it took to make Garcia lunge forward and pull the smaller blond into a smothering hug, nearly spilling coffee all over both of them in the process. "Oh, JJ, I'm just so happy you're back!"

JJ gladly returned the warm embrace. "Me, too, Pen."

Satisfied that the communications liaison really was in her presence and not just an apparition, the tech analyst handed her friend one of the coffees and took a step back. Without thinking, she blurted out "it's like the whole family is back together again!" Her eyes went wide, as she quickly realized her mistake, the happiness draining from her face. "I mean..."

JJ's own facial expression mirrored her friend's. They both seemingly were sad for completely different reasons but ultimately it was the same reason. They both missed their friend, the one member of the family that wouldn't be present today.

JJ started to speak but was cut off but a voice at the door. "Conference room. One minute." Hotch continued his walk past JJ's door before stopping and taking a step back. "Oh, and welcome back, JJ." With Hotch now out of sight, JJ made eye contact with Garcia and gave her a quick small smile before they followed the Unit Chief's lead.

As JJ approached the conference room, she noticed fellow agents Spencer Reid and David Rossi were already present. Each leapt to their feet, acting surprised to see her back at the BAU. JJ saw right through them. "Well, I see _someone_ already told you guys I'd be back today." JJ turned to look at her best friend, who smiled sheepishly. "Guilty."

JJ laughed. Looking around the room, she asked, "Where's Derek?"

Hotch was the one to answer her. "That's actually why I called this meeting."

Everyone immediately went silent and, alarmed, turned to look at the Unit Chief.

With no further explanation, Hotch continued, "Have a seat and I'll explain." Without a word each of the agents and the tech analyst quickly took their seats. The mood in the room had turned from one of joy to one of anxious anticipation. Each agent feared the worse.

"I appreciate each of you taking the past two weeks to assess your individual priorities and career aspirations. I had hoped that each of you would be able to continue to be a BAU team member, if you so chose, but unfortunately that is not the case for Agent Seaver. It has been decided that she will continue her training at the Los Angeles field office."

They all were saddened by this news, but they brushed it off, sensing what Hotch really had to say was much bigger. Garcia repeated JJ's unanswered question, "What about Derek? Is he okay?"

The answer came, but not from Hotch. "Come on now, baby girl, you know I'm more than just okay." Morgan stood in the doorway to the conference room, looking perfectly healthy, save the bandage on his head. They all breathed a sigh of relief and jumped to their feet.

"My sweet hunk of chocolate!" came Garcia's immediate reaction. She jumped from her seat and, for the second time that morning, pulled one of her co-workers into a hug. Her hand went to his head, softly touching the bandage, "What happened to your head?"

Morgan shrugged, "It's nothing, just a scratch and a few stitches." The truth was it hurt like hell but there was no way he was going to admit that.

Reid spoke up, "How did you hit your head?"

Morgan didn't answer right away. Instead, he walked over to the conference table and sat down. The rest of the team, save Hotch, came to stand around him, looking at him expectantly. "I did it in Spain."

"Spain!" Garcia gasped, "What were you doing in Spain?" JJ sunk down in a seat as she felt her heart rate increase. Had Morgan been doing what she thinks he had been doing?

The profiler answered bluntly, "I spent the past two weeks in Europe."

Rossi was the next to speak, "What aren't you telling us?"

His voice devoid of any emotion, Morgan answered, "Ian Doyle is dead. I killed him."

For the second time in the past minute, Garcia audibly gasped. As the rest of the team struggled to grasp the this news, it was only Hotch and JJ that truly knew its true meaning. But, JJ wondered to herself, what did it really mean? Was Emily coming home? JJ felt her stomach twists in knots. She hadn't seen the brunette since Paris six months ago. "Oh my god, Paris..." JJ whispered under her breath. Her thoughts were interrupted by Rossi, who had taken a seat next to Morgan and placed his hand on the darker man's shoulder. He seemed to have sensed that there still was something weighing on Morgan's mind.

"Morgan, you shouldn't feel bad about killing Doyle." Rossi made sure to look the younger agent directly in the eye as he spoke. "He took a member of our family and he deserved to pay for it. You did what all of us wanted to do. What any of us wishes we had done."

Morgan didn't bat an eye as he responded. "You don't understand, Rossi. I wanted more than anything to kill him, to get revenge. I don't feel the least bit guilty about what I did."

"Then what is it?" asked Rossi, incredulously.

"Emily," was all Morgan said. JJ held her breath.

"What about Emily?" came Reid's soft voice.

"She's..." Morgan started to answer, as he moved his gaze to over Rossi's shoulder, towards the open door to the conference room.

"Alive." finished a strong female voice, coming from where Morgan's gaze was directed.

JJ didn't turn to look. She'd know that voice anywhere.


	3. Chapter 3

**AFTER THE STORM**

CHAPTER THREE

_And I took you by the hand,_

_and we stood tall._

_And remembered our own land,_

_what we lived for._

She sat looking out the compact window of the Airbus A330. Somewhere below, she knew, was the Atlantic Ocean, its depths holding secrets and a uniqueness likely never to reach the surface. She grasped the significance of this, thinking of her own identity she preferred remain buried deep. But why? Why was she so adamant about never letting anyone in, never letting anyone see the real Emily Prentiss? She had spent the previous six months pretending to be a ghost, chasing a man that literally thought her dead. She had embarked on this challenge after running from every one and every thing she cared about and loved. She told herself it was to protect them but deep down she knew it was because of her own fear and guilt. She had begun to treat these people as if they were a family and look at what she had brought upon them. Their lives were put in danger by a woman who, as far as they might be concerned, didn't bother to even say goodbye, let alone even asking for their help. As Emily continued looking out the window, all she could see was a thick cover of cloud, not an ocean. Clouds are dense, disorienting, hard to navigate. But one must descend through the clouds before ever reaching the ocean below.

"Can I get you another drink, ma'am?"

Emily was pulled from her thoughts at this inquiry. She turned to see a flight attendant, waiting for her response. She shook her head slightly, while verbalizing, "No, thank you though."

The attendant turned her attention to another passenger. Emily looked at the sleeping man in the aisle seat next to her. She was exhausted beyond description but had always had difficulty sleeping on commercial planes. Or at least that was her excuse. Truth be told, she hadn't had a good nights sleep in the past six months. Maybe that would change now that it was all over and she was finally returning home. But Emily knew that was wishful thinking. Ian Doyle may be dead, but there was still much that needed to be dealt with back in the States.

A smile crept across her face as she could hear Morgan softly snoring, oblivious to his surroundings. Apparently she wasn't the only one who was exhausted.

They hadn't spoken much since their reunion. Emily had filled Morgan in on some of the specifics of how she had faked her death and what she had been up to. She had been naive to think that she could protect the team simply by leaving. Of course they would want to seek revenge on her behalf, never stopping until they succeeded. Emily wasn't at all surprised that Morgan had physical pursued Doyle, though she suspected that the other team members had pursued him in their own ways.

Surprisingly, Morgan hadn't been angry at her, though he obviously was hurt. They practically were partners, didn't she know she could trust him with anything? But deep down she could see that on some level Morgan understood why she did what she did and he didn't blame her. It would take some time to repair their relationship and mutual trust but for the time being he just seemed grateful she was alive. Emily suspected the reception wouldn't be as easy for some of the other team members, particularly Garcia and Reid. For all the compassion the tech analyst possessed and all the intellect flowing from the boy-genius's brain, neither would understand as easily as Morgan the lengths we sometimes must go through to protect those we love. Somehow, Emily thought, I'll make it up to them.

She hadn't told Morgan every detail of her time in hiding, but he had picked up on his own that Hotch and JJ were in the know. JJ. Of all of the people Emily was going to have to face in her return home, and to most others her return was from the dead even, the blond communications liaison terrified her the most. The team's former communications liaison, Emily corrected herself. JJ herself had been absent from the team practically a year now, reassigned to the Department of Defense.

Emily sighed and reclined in her seat, shifting to get as comfortable as possible. As she closed her eyes, she thought of JJ. Of her eyes, as bright and blue as Emily had ever seen. Of her smile, so infectious and genuine it could alter for the better the mood of an entire room. Of the great times, and the tough times they had shared between them. On destination at cases all over the United States. At the office in Quantico. Outside of work. Paris...

Emily constantly had to make a conscious effort not to think of Paris, of what had happened there. Now not being an exception, she shifted her thoughts to a different memory. A slight smile came across her face as she thought back to that cold January day.

"_Em, are you sure you're up for this?"_

_Hearing the concern in JJ's voice, Emily turned to look at her friend. The two women were sitting in the blond's SUV in the middle of a vast parking lot. Outside, the frigid winter air was whipping around what must have been a foot of snow, much more in some of the drifts. The forecast Emily had seen had called for a windchill of 10 degrees, with more snow expected to fall. _

"_Of course I'm up for it!" The truth was that Emily was scared to death, but she certainly wasn't going to let JJ know that._

_JJ narrowed her eyes a bit. "Well, you should know that the look on your face is one of pure terror. I know the weather looks pretty harsh..." _

_Emily interrupted her friend, "Jay, if I am afraid, it's certainly not the weather that I'm afraid of."_

"_Then what is it?" Now a confused look had come across the blond's face. Then she noticed the twinkle in Emily's eyes and realized she was teasing her. She reached across the car to playfully punch the brunette in the shoulder. "Ugh! **I **am not scary! Have you been listening to Morgan again?"_

"_JJ, I don't need Morgan to tell me that you plus football is a dangerous combination, especially if your team loses."_

_The blond turned back towards the windshield, feigning pouting,"Well then, let's just hope they win." A smile spread across her face as she turned off her car and turned back to her friend, "Ready?"_

"_Ready." As they exited the SUV, neither was prepared for the immediate shock of the conditions outside. Both were wearing stocking caps and gloves and multiple layers of clothing beneath their winter coats. Emily paused to move the zipper of her coat all the way up, pulling the fabric closed around her neck. They walked to the trunk to get the blankets they had brought with them for extra warmth._

"_So, this is a playoff game, right?" Emily's question appeared to physically materialize from her mouth, as her warm breath met the cold air. _

_JJ brightened at the opportunity to talk about her beloved team. "Yes! The Redskins are playing the Rams and if they win, they'll only be one game away from the Super Bowl."_

"_And the Rams are from... St. Louis?" Emily was trying to recall the research she had done before the game. She had wanted to be prepared, knowing how fanatical JJ was about football._

"_They started in Cleveland and then moved to Los Angeles but yes, now they're in St. Louis." Emily smiled as JJ rambled off more facts, thinking how adorable the blond was when she was being nerdy. JJ's brother had gotten her the tickets for Christmas, but he lived with the rest of JJ's family in Pennsylvania so she had asked Emily if she wanted to go. Emily had been surprised, and hesitant at first, but had jumped at the chance to spend more time with the blond outside of work._

_The two had been friends since Emily had joined the BAU and gradually, over time, the friendship had become stronger. Their friendship had a playful banter, which sometimes bordered on flirtation. Or at least Emily knew it was flirtation on her part, it was JJ's side she wasn't sure of. Lately she had sensed something shifting in their friendship. It almost seemed to Emily that each was getting braver and more brazen in their flirtation, as if daring the other to respond. Nothing had happened between them yet, and they hadn't talked about it, but Emily could tell they seemed to be moving towards something. What that was, she wasn't sure._

_They made their way with the rest of the crowd into the stadium. They finally reached their seats and Emily marveled at how close they were to the field. "Wow, your brother must have paid a lot of money for these seats! Are you sure I can't give you any money for my ticket?"_

_JJ laughed and explained, "Yes, I am sure so stop asking, Em! The tickets were a gift. And while they usually are very expensive, my brother has connections that I'm sure he used to get a good deal."_

_Emily held up her hand, "Alright, alright. I'll just say thank you and enjoy myself then."_

"_Good!" _

_The brunette looked at the stadium's jumbo-tron, while still showed fifteen minutes until kick-off. "How about I go get us some beers? Maybe the alcohol will help make us feel warmer."_

"_Sounds good, here let me give you some money." JJ started to remove her glove, with the intention of reaching into her pocket to get her cash._

"_No way," came Emily's response, as she already was moving towards the aisle. "You've paid for enough, JJ. What kind of date would I be if I let you pay for everything?" She hadn't meant to say this last part, but it came out before she could stop it. She noticed JJ was smiling at her, but Emily could tell there also was a hint of confusion in her face, as she too seemed surprised that Emily had said this. JJ didn't look away as she answered, carefully, "Okay, Em."_

_Unsure of what else to say or do, Emily shot JJ a playful look and hurried towards the aisle. As she carefully climbed the stairs towards the concession stand, she cursed at herself under her breath for being so obvious._

_Ten minutes later she was carefully making her way back down the steps towards their seats, a large beer in each gloved hand. As she got close, she saw JJ and couldn't help but smile. The blond had already made friends and seemed to be engaged in a conversation with the two men next to her and the man and woman in front of her. "I'm telling you, there's no way Shanahan is keeping McNabb and Haynesworth long term. They're not his style of players," Emily could hear JJ saying. Based on his response, one of the men seemed to be disputing JJ's opinion. _

_Emily was now at her seat, standing next to JJ. Emily outstretched one of her hands, handing a beer to JJ. As JJ took it from her, their hands lightly touched and even though they both we wearing gloves, Emily couldn't help but notice the contact and feel her heart flutter. "Thanks, Em."_

_They settled in, preparing for the game to start. JJ took one of the blankets they had brought and draped it across both their lower halves, adding a new layer of warmth. Despite the cold, Emily found that she really did enjoy watching the game. There were a few times where JJ had to explain things to her, but Emily could tell she wasn't annoyed at having to do this. Much to Emily's delight, JJ's team was playing quite well, which seemed to put the blond in a good mood._

_But due to a couple unlucky plays and a referee call that, according to JJ, was "bullshit", the game was all tied up early in the fourth quarter. A bitter wind had picked up and snow had started to fall and by the middle of the quarter, Emily noticed JJ had begun to shiver next to her. The blond must have realized she noticed, as she said, "It's a little cold, don't you think?"_

_Emily laughed but was concerned. "Yes, just a little. Are you okay?"_

"_Yeah, I'll make it. The game is almost over anyway." JJ tried to sound convincing, but her teeth chattering gave her away. Emily thought for a moment, trying to decide what to do. Finally, she removed her right arm from under the blanket and without looking at JJ, she put her arm around the blond. Emily rubbed her hand up and down JJ's right shoulder and arm a few times before keeping her arm draped across the blond's shoulders. She pulled their bodies closer, creating warmth, although the armrest was preventing them from completely coming together. Still not looking at JJ, she said clearly but softly, "Better?"_

"_Better." was JJ's only response, though Emily could feel her body leaning into her._

_They remained situated like this, their conversation ceasing. As the seconds ticked away on the clock, Emily could sense the crowd becoming nervous and anxious. The Rams had managed to get a field goal with ten seconds left. Emily had picked up enough about the game to know that unless the Redskins could get a touchdown on the kick-off, they would lose. As the Rams prepared to kick off, the crowd got to its feet, Emily and JJ included. Emily begrudgingly let her arm drop from around JJ and immediately missed the warmth of the blond's body. To her surprise, she felt JJ grasp her hand firmly. Emily tried to pay attention to the kick off but all she could think about was her hand touching JJ's. It was the roar of the crowd that clued her into that a player from the Redskins had caught the ball and actually was getting close to scoring a touchdown, with only one player to beat. JJ started jumping up and down next to her as the player made a move and caused the opposing player to miss. He made it the last twenty yard unopposed, causing the entire stadium to go crazy, including Emily and JJ._

_Before Emily knew what was happening, JJ had pulled her into a hug, still jumping up and down and yelling. Emily didn't know what else to do, so she did the same. After a few moments, JJ pulled back slightly. They made eye contact for the first time since Emily had put her arm around the blond. They both had huge smiles on their faces and as their eyes locked, Emily felt as if the whole stadium went quiet and ceased to exist. For a split second, Emily thought JJ was going to kiss her. But instead the blond pulled out of her embrace and turned back towards the field. JJ was quiet, only for a moment, before she started cheering again but Emily could tell it wasn't as loud as before._

_As the celebrations winded down, the crowd began filing out of the stadium. Emily and JJ made their way back towards JJ's card, making small talk along the way. Neither seemed willing to talk about Emily's gesture or that JJ had almost kissed her. They continued their innocent talking about nothing of significance all the way back to Emily's apartment._

_They pulled up to the curb outside Emily's building. JJ put the SUV in park, but didn't turn off the engine. Emily didn't want things to be awkward so she immediately spoke up, turning to the blond, "Well JJ, I had a great time. I really appreciate you taking me."_

"_No problem! And I had a great time, too!" JJ added, a little too quickly, which made Emily realize she also was trying to make this as not awkward as possible._

"_Well then, I'll see you tomorrow at work. Have a good evening, JJ." Emily opened the door and started to get out of the car._

"_You, too," JJ responded, before adding, "And Em?"_

_Emily stood outside of the car and peering back in through the open door._

"_Thanks for coming with me. I really did have fun." JJ's voice sounded genuine and Emily noticed how her eyes sparkled as she said this._

"_Anytime, Jay," she responded and with a smile, she closed the door and waved goodbye through the window. _

_Once inside her apartment, Emily removed her multiple layers of clothing before getting comfortable on her couch. She replayed the day's events in her mind, analyzing and over-analyzing each moment with the blond. Exhausted, she finally laughed to herself and shook her head. Her and JJ were adults, so why must they act like teenagers? She decided that the possibility alone of JJ saying yes was enough to face the fear or rejection in asking her out on a date. A real date._

Emily awoke with a start on the plane. The pilot was talking on the loudspeaker, announcing that they were making their final descent into D.C. It took her a moment to realize she had been dreaming, reliving an earlier memory. A very happy memory.

But her happiness turned to sadness as she recalled the events after that day. She had intended to talk to JJ, level set with her, and ask her on a date. But that day had never come. Soon after their football outing was when JJ had been transferred to the Department of Defense. JJ wasn't moving far, but Emily could tell how preoccupied the blond was with the uncertainty of having to start a new job. Figuring that the last thing on JJ's mind was going on a date, she had let the matter drop for the time being.

Of course she had always intended to still talk to JJ and still ask her out, as her feelings did not wane in the blond's absence, but then she had been contacted by her former Interpol colleagues and everything with Doyle had started.

Once Emily had decided to run, to find Doyle for herself, she knew she could tell none of her BAU family. They would insist on helping her, protecting her. But she knew that would only put them in danger and she wouldn't have been able to live with herself if anything happened to any of them because of her. She left without saying goodbye to any of them, or at least they didn't know she was saying goodbye at the time.

But she couldn't leave without seeing JJ one last time. Before she left for Boston to find Doyle, she had made a detour to D.C. She had pulled into the parking lot of coffee shop and waited. Like clockwork, Emily had seen JJ's dark SUV pull into the parking lot and park on the opposite side. It was Wednesday, and Emily knew JJ always stopped for coffee on Wednesdays before work. Emily had held her breath as she had watched the blond, who had looked to her as beautiful as ever, exit her car and make her way into the shop. JJ had emerged five minutes later, and Emily had looked at her one last time before starting up her car and leaving.

Other than Paris, that was the last time Emily had seen JJ. She knew JJ was at the hospital she had gone to after being stabbed by Doyle, but she herself had never laid eyes on the blond.

"Prentiss, you ready?"

Emily realized the plane had landed and Morgan was waiting for her to rise from her seat. They made their way through the airport, needing to go to the taxi stand. "Well, how does it feel to be home?"

"Good."

"I'll bet you're excited to see everyone tomorrow."

Emily didn't respond to Derek's assumption. The truth was she was terrified. How would they receive her?

The next day Emily stood alone outside the BAU. The plan was for Derek to go in first, explain the situation, and then she would make her entrance. As she climbed the stairs towards the conference room where the team was assembled, her nerves threatened to get the best of her. She approached the open doorway to the room.

She stood to the side, still out of sight, though she could see into the room. All the attention on Derek, so no one had noticed her standing there. Slowly she looked from one person to the next, feeling as if they were the ones who had been dead and now returned. Her breath caught in her throat as she finally noticed the blond seated next to Derek. She hadn't expected to JJ to be here. She hadn't expected to have to see her so soon. She had little time to think about this unexpected turn of events, as she heard Morgan speak her name. Taking a deep breath, she stepped forward.


	4. Chapter 4

**AFTER THE STORM**

CHAPTER FOUR

_And now I cling to what I knew,_

_I saw exactly what was true._

_But oh no more, that's why I hold, _

_that's why I hold, with all I have._

_That's why I hold._

"Emily!"

Garcia's exclamation confirmed what JJ already knew: Emily Prentiss was standing a mere ten feet behind her. She closed her eyes and took a breath, inhaling and exhaling, before finally turning to look.

JJ knew Emily would be standing in the doorway to the conference room but that didn't prevent the immediate and intense reaction she felt as soon as her eyes fell upon the older woman. Her breath caught in her throat as she took in Emily's pale skin, her deep sunken eyes, how impossibly thinner she looked, standing there in clothes that at one time were familiar but now seemed two sizes too big. Despite obvious evidence to the contrary, Emily stood perfectly erect, head held high, as if she was letting everyone, including her own body, know that no amount of exhaustion would break her.

Garcia rushed to Emily but stopped just short of hugging her. She was concerned she may hurt the brunette just by touching her. But she was still Garcia and therefore was unable to resist. She gently leaned in, bending only at the waist, to wrap her arms around the newly resurrected profiler.

"I don't understand, how are you here?" For once, it seemed that the genius Spencer Reid was faced with something that to him defied explanation.

Hotch supplied the answer, in his usual manner-of-fact tone, "Six months ago, Ian Doyle attempted to kill Prentiss. It was decided at that time that it was best for everyone if he thought he succeeded."

"Best how, Hotch?" Garcia was no longer embracing Emily, but one of her hands remained on the brunette's shoulder, displaying her protective nature. "How is Emily faking her death, making all of us believe she really was dead, best for us?"

For the first time since her dramatic entrance, Emily herself spoke up. "I put all of you in danger. Doyle wouldn't have stopped until he killed me and everyone I love..." at this, she stole a quick glance at the JJ, whose eyes were cast downwards, staring at her own hands. The brunette looked back to Garcia. "It was the only way. I'm sorry."

Reid was the one to respond to this. "You should have said goodbye." Unlike the tech analyst, he had not come to Emily's side. Instead, he remained sitting at the table, his attention focused on the iPad in front of him. His desperate attempt to seem uninterested and therefore not hurt was obvious. Emily's face softened as she walked over to him.

Hotch tried to explain, "That was not a decision made by Emily. The Director decided only a handful of people would know the truth. It was the only way to be certain Doyle wouldn't find out."

Emily touched the young agent's shoulder, hesitantly. "Spence... I'm sorry."

His only response was to shrug and mumble a half-hearted, "It's okay." Emily smiled slightly. She knew she'd have to work hard to regain the trust of her friend, but for now she was just happy knowing he didn't hate her.

The room remained silent for a few moments. Rossi then pulled out the chair next to him before saying, "Well, are you going to tell us what you've been up to for the past six months?"

Emily smiled at him before taking the seat. "I don't even know where to begin."

"Well, where did you go?"

"Europe. As I think Morgan already told you guys, we both caught up with Doyle in Madrid but I also spent time in Rome, Venice," Emily hesitated and again looked towards JJ, who still wouldn't meet her eyes. She continued, "... Paris." In brief terms, Emily explained the duration of her time on the run, her decision to find Doyle before he figured out the truth about her. Emily let Derek tell the story of Doyle's ultimate demise.

As Morgan filled in those details, Emily closed her eyes, not because she was picturing what the man was saying, but because she simply was becoming too exhausted to keep her eyes open. This did not go unnoticed by JJ. She looked at the brunette's face, trying to reconcile this broken down person in front of her with the Emily she knew.

As Morgan finished, Hotch spoke up, also having noticed Emily. "Okay, everyone, I think that's enough excitement for right now. Prentiss has plenty of paperwork to fill out and we have cases waiting for consultation." No one complained, as they knew Hotch was right. Emily stood to leave, prepared to go to the Unit Chief's office. Garcia's voice stopped her.

"We should go out after work for a drink... to celebrate!"

Everyone looked to Emily, expectantly. The brunette smiled, brightening a bit. "Sounds perfect, Pen. I'll go home and take a nap after I'm done with the paperwork and then meet you guys there later."

The tech analyst couldn't hide her excitement, always the optimist. "Now the whole family really _is_ back together!"

Just after 7:30 that evening, Garcia and JJ walked into the local bar where they were meeting Emily and the rest of the team.

"Are you sure you're okay? I feel like you didn't want to come out with us."

JJ was too busy looking around the bar, trying to find Emily, to hear the tech analyst's question. It's true, she hadn't wanted to come. But she couldn't tell Garcia that, so here she was. Her goal was to avoid being alone with Emily, which is why she was trying to locate the brunette from the minute they walked in.

Realizing her friend wasn't listening, Garcia did a short, two-toned whistle and waved her hand in front of the younger woman's face. "Hello? Earth to JJ?"

"Huh?" JJ focused on the other woman, realizing she'd missed her question.

"I said, are you okay?"

JJ knitted her brows together, "Oh, yeah, I'm fine. Just tired. You know, first day back and all."

"If you say so," was all Garcia said in response. She nodded her head in the direction over JJ's shoulder. "There they are."

JJ turned to look and sure enough Morgan and Reid were standing with Emily near one of the tables. None of them had noticed the two women walk in. Garcia started towards them but JJ grabbed her arm and pulled her in the opposite direction, towards the bar. "Wait, let's get a drink first."

As they stood at the bar waiting for the bartender to serve them their beers, JJ glanced back in the direction of the rest of the team. To her surprise, Emily was staring right at her. Their eyes locked and JJ felt her heart skip a beat. From Emily's reappearance this morning up until now she had managed to completely avoid this happening. She quickly looked away, breaking their connection.

Once they each had their beer and had tipped the bartender, JJ quickly steered Garcia towards a booth, explaining, "I'm so tired, Pen, let's go ahead and sit down while there's still one available. They'll come over when they see us."

"Okay, what is going on with you? If I didn't know any better, I'd say you are avoiding Emily."

They each took a seat on an opposite side of the booth before JJ responded to this accusation. "Don't be silly. What reason could I possibly have for avoiding her?" JJ had made sure her seat was the one not facing the woman they were speaking of.

Garcia took a sip of her beer, mulling over this question, searching for a reasonable response. She shrugged, "Oh, I don't know. I suppose it would be a bit strange to find out that the woman you secretly love and thought was dead actually is alive."

"Shh!" JJ's expression turned to one of pure panic. "I told you that in confidence! And I'm not even sure it was true at the time and it's certainly not true now!"

Garcia rolled here eyes and smiled. "One, there is no such thing as 'in confidence' with me, you should know that by now." She took another sip of her beer. "And two, puh-lease. Cupcake, you so loved her. Dare I say you were even _in_ love with her." The older woman thought about this for a second. "In fact, I was worried sick about you after Emily 'died'. I couldn't believe how composed you were at the funeral."

As her own words sunk in, this caused something to click in Garcia's mind. Her eyes went wide as she gasped loudly.

"What?" JJ quickly looked up from her hands, which had been playing with the sticker label of her beer.

"You knew!"

"Knew what?" JJ tried to sound nonchalant, but she knew she was busted.

"You knew Emily was alive!"

"Maybe..." came JJ's non-committal answer. She winced, knowing what was coming.

"And. You. Didn't. Tell. ME!" Garcia punctuated each word with a slap to JJ's shoulder.

"Well, I was going to ask if I could sit down but not if it means I'll get assaulted." The two blond women turned to see the very subject of their discussion standing at their table, beer in hand.

"Ah, there's my raven haired beauty! Come on, have a seat." Garcia scooted further into the booth and patted the seat cushion next to her. "I promise I won't hit _you_." At this, she pretended to glare at JJ. She then looked over the brunette's shoulder, "Where are Morgan and Reid?"

"Apparently Rossi is having some car trouble so they went to help him out. Said they'd be back soon." Emily answered, taking her place next to Garcia.

"Hi, JJ." Emily said cautiously. The brunette had quickly figured out since the morning that JJ was not going to be giving her a warm reception. In fact, she appeared to be the only member of the team that truly was mad at the brunette. Well, I can't really blame her, Emily thought to herself.

Emily was disheartened when JJ continued to pretend that her beer bottle was the most interesting thing to look at in the bar. She did, however, respond with a soft "Hi."

Luckily, all of this went unnoticed by Garcia, who immediately started in, wanting to know all of the details of Emily's 'dead time'. "So, buttercup, tell me all about Europe. How was Paris?"

This got JJ's attention. "Yes, Emily, how was _Paris_?" she added, sarcastically. Garcia looked at JJ, her eyes narrowing at the blond's tone.

JJ finally was looking right at Emily now, directly in the eyes, but the brunette almost wished she wasn't. JJ's eyes looked cold, lifeless. Gone was the brilliant blue Emily longed for. She gulped, swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat. "Paris was... amazing," she answered honestly.

JJ snorted at this, a cruel and short laugh escaping her mouth. "But haven't you been all over the world? I mean Paris couldn't have been that 'amazing', as you say." JJ continued to stare daggers at the brunette, seemingly trying to bore holes into her.

"JJ..." came Garcia's voice, her tone stern.

Emily held JJ's gaze, her own expression soft but steady and unwavering as if she was challenging the blond. "Maybe if you gave me a chance to explain."

JJ rolled her eyes, but this time didn't laugh. Garcia just looked back and forth between her two friends, unsure of what was going on, her mouth slightly agape.

"Whatever. I'm going to get a refill." JJ was out of her seat and halfway to the bar before either Emily or Garcia could respond. Emily watched her go, saddened by this reaction.

"I have never seen JJ act like that. What is going on?"

Emily turned to look at Garcia and shrugged, "Nothing." Garcia gave a hard stare, unconvinced. Seeing the other woman wasn't going to back down, Emily sighed, her shoulders deflating. "I saw JJ in Paris."

"You saw JJ in Paris?" Garcia repeated, a confused look on her face. She had only recently realized that JJ had known all along that Emily was still alive, so the possibility that they might have even seen each other hadn't yet crossed her mind. "How? Why?"

"She was my State Department contact. She came to give me passports and bank account information about three weeks after I went underground," Emily replied, not meeting Garcia's eyes.

"Uh huh and..." the tech analyst pried.

"And what?"

"Did something happen between the two of you?" Garcia said bluntly. There was no sense tip-toeing around the subject. She knew how JJ felt about Emily and she'd long suspected the feelings were mutual.

"What do you mean? Why would something happen between us?" Emily was playing dumb but she knew it ultimately was no use.

Garcia called her bluff. "Don't play dumb with me, Emily Prentiss. You and JJ may be clueless but don't forget for a second that I always know everything."

Emily raised an eyebrow,"Everything?"

This, combined with Emily's knowing look, caused Garcia to exclaim, "Okay, unless it involves someone faking their own death! You know what, don't change the subject! Or I take back what I said earlier and I _will_ hit you!"

Emily laughed but still didn't offer anything. Like JJ earlier, she too had become interested in her beer bottle.

"Emily..." Garcia tried, in a soft voice. She lightly touched the brunette's arm.

Emily looked at her, "Garcia, I can't. If you must know, then make JJ tell you." To Garcia, Emily almost looked ashamed.

Garcia had never seen Emily look so defeated. "It's okay, Princess. I'm sure it wasn't your fault."

This seemed to affect Emily the most. Garcia's heart went out to the brunette, seeing her like this, in her weakened state. Garcia saw tears begin form in Emily's eyes and realized her exhaustion must have finally pushed her towards the brink of a breakdown.

"That's just it. It was my fault."

The tech analyst didn't know what to say to this.

Emily looked up and saw JJ had finished at the bar and was turning towards them, about to return to the table. Emily looked at Garcia again, her eyes pleading, "Pen, please just remember that I thought I was doing what was best. I thought it was over." She looked back across the room and saw JJ was halfway back to them. Emily saw JJ notice her, a confused look coming over her face .

"You thought what was over?"

Instead of answering Garcia, Emily wiped her eyes and stood. "I have to go. Tell JJ I'm sorry. Later Pen." and with that she was gone.

JJ returned to the table and stood next to it, staring towards the direction Emily went. "Where is Emily going?"

"She said she needed to go."

JJ slid into the booth opposite her friend, still looking towards where the brunette had disappeared. "Was she... was she crying?"

Instead of answering her question, Garcia said only, "What happened between the two of you in Paris?"

JJ turned back to Garcia, shocked. She must have heard her wrong. "What did you say?"

"What happened in Paris between you and Emily? And don't say nothing."

JJ sighed. There was no avoiding the subject anymore.


	5. Chapter 5

**AFTER THE STORM**

CHAPTER FIVE

_And I will die alone, and be left there,_

_well I guess I'll just go home, or God knows where._

_Because death is just so full, and man so small._

_Well I'm scared of what's behind,_

_and what's before._

JJ looked at the note she had scribbled:

_Cafe _

_Rue L'Universite_

_8:30 p.m. _

She glanced at her watch for seemingly the hundredth time. It was 8:25, meaning she had five minutes to get to the cafe. Despite her limited understanding of French, she deciphered from the loudspeaker that the subway train would be arriving at her destination in one minute. That left her plenty of time to get across the street to the cafe.

The blond checked her outfit. It should be the least of her concerns, given why she was in Paris, but she couldn't help it. She had chosen dark fitted jeans, an oversized gray jacket with the sleeves pushed up to her forearms, and a light purple silk scarf tied around her neck. She smoothed her hands over her hair, making sure it was still tightly pulled back. She could pass for any other American tourist, which was the point, but she also hoped she looked good.

The subway train slowed to a stop. As the doors opened, JJ rose and pulled her purse close to her, making sure the large envelope was still inside. She moved with the crowd towards the exit, mounting the steps towards the Paris street.

At the surface, she looked around to get her bearings. To her right, she saw the Eiffel Tower, spectacularly lit up. She wanted to stay and admire the landmark, but one glance at her watch showed it was only a minute until 8:30. She looked to her left and saw the cafe. Her eyes immediately found the brunette, sitting alone at a table just outside the establishment. Her hair was shorter and she was wearing clothes and shoes not her typical style and a newspaper was blocking the lower half of her face. But there was no fooling JJ, she knew it was Emily Prentiss the instant she saw her.

She stood there a moment, knowing the brunette hadn't seen her yet. Her breath caught in her throat and her heart skipped a beat as her nerves threatened to get the best of her. It had only been three weeks since Emily had "died" but JJ hadn't seen her in much longer. By now it must have been six months since she last laid eyes on the woman.

JJ took a deep breath and crossed the Parisian street, her eyes never wavering from her target. As she approached Emily, the brunette looked up and began to lower her paper. JJ's gaze immediately dropped to the ground, unable to meet the other woman's eyes. She made the last few steps this way, and immediately took a seat at the table and reaching into her purse for the envelope. Only then did she raise her eyes, but Emily also was only looking at JJ's purse.

The blond did the same and removed the envelope from her bag. She set it across the table from her, in front of the brunette, explaining, "Passports from three different countries." JJ was careful not to address Emily by name. "And a bank account in each one to keep you comfortable." At this last part, she stole another glance at Emily. To her dismay, the brunette still wouldn't meet her eyes.

Emily reached for the envelope and tipped it towards her. She stared at it, as if she could see through the light gray paper and read its contents. She finally took the envelope and placed it in her own bag. JJ couldn't help but notice how weak Emily sounded as she responded only with, "Thank you."

JJ continued to stare into the brunette's face, hoping she would look at her. When she didn't, JJ said the only thing she could think of. "Good luck."

Without another word, Emily rose and walked away. JJ remained seated, but her eyes followed the brunette as she left the cafe and crossed the street. Emily hadn't looked at her once, hadn't even said goodbye.

When she could no longer see Emily, JJ turned back to the table. She sighed, deflated. She sat there for another five minutes before she stood and collected her bag to return to the subway. The blond noticed Emily had left behind her newspaper. She grabbed it, not wanting to leave a mess. As she raised the newsprint from the table, a small piece of white paper fell out. JJ grabbed the paper and glanced around before unfolding it and reading its contents.

_Hotel Relais du Louvre, 15 minutes_

_-Em_

Confused, JJ quickly looked back to where the brunette had disappeared. There were only strangers there now. She grabbed her things and hurried towards the subway. Once on the train, JJ removed the note from her pocket to read it again, trying to see if there was anything she had missed. Had Emily meant to leave her this note? And why that hotel, where JJ was already staying?

The return trip to the hotel seemed to take twice as long but finally JJ was practically running through the entrance. She hesitated as she passed the front desk, wondering if perhaps Emily had left her a message on where to meet. Quickly deciding Emily would have thought this too risky, she did the only thing she could think of and made her way towards her room. Standing outside room 221, she removed her electronic key from her purse and paused, taking a deep breath before inserting the key into the access reader. The door's lock clicked and JJ cautiously pushed the door open. The room was dark.

"Emily?"

Suddenly JJ was pulled into the room, by someone in the darkness. The blond saw Emily quickly stick her head out into the hallway and look both ways, before closing the door and turning on the light. Emily stayed at the door, her back press against it, as she finally looked JJ in the face.

"Oh, so you're going to look at me now?" JJ registered the hurt in her own voice and realized then how much Emily's demeanor at the cafe had affected her.

A small smile spread across Emily's face. "Well, I left you a note, didn't I?"

At this, JJ crossed the steps between them and pulled the brunette into a hug. "Oh, Emily. I've missed you so much." JJ felt Emily's arms go around her to return the hug but she also felt her friend's body tense up. This in turn made JJ become tense, too.

Emily pulled back, "I've missed you, too, JJ."

Up close, JJ could see how tired Emily was. "How are you doing?"

Emily shrugged and walked passed JJ, further into the room. "I'm okay. As well as could be expected I suppose." She was silent for a moment before turning back to face the blond. "How is the team? How are they dealing with... with my..." Emily couldn't finish the sentence.

"With your death? Emily, they're heartbroken." JJ answered honestly. "From what I hear Garcia stops to stare at your picture on the wall outside the BAU at least five times a day. Reid pretends that nothing has happened and won't talk to anyone about it. Seaver is considering transferring her training elsewhere. And Morgan... well, of course Morgan just wants someone to pay." The room grew silent as Emily digested this information. It was bitter sweet, knowing she was missed but at the same time knowing all of these people were in pain because of her.

JJ just stood watching Emily process everything she had told her. She still couldn't believe the brunette was standing here, right in front of her. She thought of the message her friend had left her at the cafe. "But is that why we're here, Emily? Why you left me that note? To talk about the team?"

Emily met JJ's eyes but was unable to read into them to get the blond's intention behind her words. She decided to take a chance. Without looking away, Emily untied the belt of her coat and removed it, throwing it off to the side. Next, she unzipped and stepped out of her knee-high black heeled boots. Only then did she speak a short command, "Come here."

JJ didn't need to be told twice. She practically lunged forward, her hands going to either side of the brunette's head and pulling her face towards hers. Their mouths met, causing JJ to involuntarily shiver and let out a soft moan at the contact. Though a long time coming, this was still their first kiss. The fact that Emily was supposedly dead when it had finally happened hadn't yet occurred to JJ.

Emily's arms wrapped around JJ's body as she returned the kiss. Her hands moved their way up and down the blond's back, feeling the heat of the skin below the fabric of her clothes. Slowly Emily inched their bodies backwards until she succeeded in pinning the blond against hotel room door.

Emily moved her hands to JJ's scarf and untied it before discarding it on the floor. In one motion, she also pulled the blond's jacket over her head, exposing the white v-neck shirt below. Moving her hands to JJ's hands, she took them and pinned them above her on the door, interlocking their fingers in the process.

Having Emily be so dominant with her only served to further arouse JJ. Her hands were still pinned above her as Emily broke their kiss and began to hastily kiss her way up and down the blond's neck, stopping to pay attention to particularly sensitive spots. JJ struggled under the brunette's grasp, trying to gain the upper hand. Emily just stopped and smiled at her seductively before re-taking the younger woman's mouth with her own, at the same time pressing her body harder into JJ's.

This time, JJ snaked her tongue into Emily's mouth, fighting for dominance. She felt Emily begin to melt, the brunette's body growing heavy against her own as her knees seemed to buckle slightly. Sensing this to be her opportunity, JJ pushed against Emily, moving them a foot or two away from the door, also giving JJ back her hands. Catching the brunette by surprise, she gave her a hard shove backwards. The shove sent Emily stumbling backwards before the back of her legs connected with the bed and she was forced into a sitting position on the edge of the bed, just as JJ had intended.

She looked up at JJ, stunned that the blond had managed to gain the upper hand. JJ enjoyed the opportunity to smirk at her before walking forward, pulling her shirt over her head as she walked. Emily appreciatively took in the blond's bra-clad breasts and toned physique, incredulous that she was even getting to look at JJ in this way, let alone about to experience it.

Emily followed suit, and removed her own shirt. JJ's eyes immediately were drawn to the left side of the brunette's body and the raised pink area of Emily's otherwise unblemished skin. A visible reminder of how JJ and the team had come to losing Emily for good. Emily had been so preoccupied taking in the sight in front of her that he hadn't noticed what had captured JJ's attention. Worried that the brunette would become self conscious of the scar and not wanting to ruin the mood, JJ continued walking towards the bed. She reached it and moved to sit on Emily's lap, facing her, her legs straddling either side of the brunette. As she their mouths met again, JJ's hands returned to Emily's head, pulling her harder into the kiss. In turn, Emily's hands pulled at JJ's ass over the denim of her jeans. In a burst of confidence, she moved her right hand to grope JJ's breast through her bra, causing the blond to moan into her mouth.

Not to be outdone, JJ moved her own hands to Emily's back and the clasp of her bra. Unhooked, the material fell away, exposing Emily's naked breasts. JJ guided them both back onto the bed, so that Emily was laying flat, before breaking their kiss and moving her mouth the taste the newly exposed flesh. Her mouth found one nipple while her hand found the other, causing Emily to gasp. JJ smiled at this reaction, looking up to the brunette's face. Emily reached down and grabbed JJ's face, pulling her back up towards her. Their hands roaming each other's bodies, JJ leaned in for a kiss but Emily stopped her, only so she could say, "First, let's get you out of these clothes."

JJ rose from the bed and began removing the remainder of her clothing, as Emily did the same. Now that they both were naked, alone, and aroused in this hotel room, it finally hit both of them what was about to transpire. Neither wanted to risk verbalizing to the other just how significant this was to them, how they had spent years hoping it would eventually come to this. They just looked at each other, admiring the sight, daring the other to speak. But neither dared. As the moment passed, JJ turned off the light while Emily climbed into bed. JJ approached the bed and climbed in on the opposite side.

Now in bed together, completely naked, each rolled on their side towards the other, their naked bodies coming together. Even without the light, Emily could sense how close JJ's face was to her own. She reached a hand forward to softly touch the blond's cheek and move the hair from her face, tucking it behind her ear. Her hand still to JJ's cheek, she leaned in, for the first time softly kissing the younger woman.

The softness quickly passed, as their feverish pace from before returned, each wanting the other so badly that even a moment's wait was too long.

An hour later, they lay sweaty and wrapped in the sheets, completely satiated. Emily lay on her back, slightly propped up, while JJ was at her side, the blond's head on the older woman's left shoulder, her body between Emily's left arm and shoulder, her arm across her naked stomach, her left leg casually strewn across the brunette's.

Despite the intimate nature of the events of the previous hour, each was suddenly shy, unsure of what to say. Instead, they lay like this for a while, completely content, enjoying the warmth each other provided. They both were exhausted, mentally and physically, and yearned for sleep. But neither wanted to give in, knowing that tomorrow didn't bring the promise of continuing what had happened tonight.

JJ moved her hand to gently touch Emily's scar. Finally, she ventured to speak. "Em?"

"Hmm?" came the muffled, mostly asleep response. Her hand was lazily drawing small pattern's on the blond's back.

"I love you."

Emily's hand stopped it's movement, but she said nothing. After a moment, JJ thought maybe she hadn't heard her. "Did you hear me?"

"Yes."

"And?" JJ's voice was barely audible. She was afraid of the answer but she needed to know it.

Taking Emily's silence for the worst, JJ begin to pull away. Not wanting this to happen, Emily moved her arm to tighten her grip on the blond, drawing their bodies close together. "No, don't do that." Satisfied that JJ wasn't resisting, she sighed and thought for a moment before continuing. "We're both tired right now... can we talk about this in the morning?" Emily felt the blond nod slightly. She reached her other arm around the younger woman and squeezed her while leaning down to kiss her on the top of her head. "Goodnight, Jay."

"Goodnight."

The next morning, JJ slowly awoke as she became aware of the sunlight streaming in through the window of her hotel room. She was laying comfortably on her stomach, the sheet pulled up around her, her arms tucked under the pillow beneath her head. Quickly, the previous night's activities came flooding back to her. She smiled and turned to face the other side of the bed.

Her smile immediately turned to a frown as she took in that she was alone in bed. She looked around the room for a sign that she wasn't also alone in the room.

"Emily?" Receiving no answer, she got up and checked the rest of the room, the bathroom. All empty. Coming back to the bed, it was then that she noticed the note on the bed atop the pillow next to hers. The pillow that the brunette's head should have been laying upon.

_I'm sorry. _

_-Em_


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: This is the final chapter of the story. It always was intended to only be six chapters, since it is my first attempt at writing a multi-chapter story and I didn't want it to get away from me. Thanks to everyone who stuck with it. I hope you enjoyed it.**

**AFTER THE STORM**

CHAPTER SIX

_There will come a time, you'll see,_

_with no more tears._

_And love will not break your heart,_

_but dismiss your fears._

_Get over your hill and see,_

_what you find there._

_With grace in your heart,_

_and flowers in your hair._

"Wow."

"I know," JJ responded. She had just finished telling Garcia what had happened between her and Emily in Paris.

Garcia continued to sip her beer, looking off into the distance. JJ could see the gears turning in her friend's head, as she processed this new information. JJ swished her beer around in the bottle before gulping the remaining liquid. "I can't believe you haven't said more. Is Penelope Garcia actually speechless?"

JJ expected a fiery response to this. Instead, Garcia turned to look at her, her eyes brows knitted together, "I'm just thinking."

JJ tried to hide the hurt in her voice, but her eyes grew dark again. "What is there to think about? I told Emily I loved her and in return she used me and left me alone in a hotel room in Paris. Seems pretty straightforward to me."

Garcia looked off into the distance again, taking a few more sips of her beer. "Maybe..." she started, "But it doesn't sound like the Emily I know."

JJ shrugged, "Well, maybe we don't know the real Emily Prentiss, after all." She set her empty beer bottle down and sighed, "I mean I know she's very private, but I never took her for heartless."

Garcia shook her head, "That's what doesn't make sense."

"What do you mean?"

"Well..." Garcia hesitated, unsure of if she should say what she was thinking of saying. Well, she reasoned to herself, it's not like things could get any worse. "It's just that the Emily I know absolutely adores you. And I don't mean in a friendly way."

"Pen, I doubt that..."

"No, JJ, it's not a question," Garcia interrupted her friend. "It's a fact. Like Morgan is sexy or Reid is a genius. Emily Prentiss is interested in you." She watched her friend carefully. She knew from past conversations that JJ was unaware of any of this. She had tried multiple times to get JJ to ask Emily out on a date, hoping JJ would get the hint, but she never did. "She's never said it explicitly but everyone knows it's true."

JJ looked shocked at this, "_Everyone_ knows? Why didn't you ever tell me?"

At the desperate and bewildered look on her best friend's face, Garcia couldn't help but laugh. "To be honest, I can't believe you never noticed. It's very obvious."

"How?"

Garcia didn't know if her friend really was that oblivious or if she was just afraid to admit the truth. "Oh, come on JJ. The two of you used to flirt all the time." JJ thought about this. When they both had still been at the BAU, she and Emily did have a strange relationship which included a lot of playful flirtation on both their parts. Nothing had ever happened between them then, though not for lack of desire on JJ's part. But there was that time, before JJ had left the BAU, that they had gone to a football game and Emily had casually referred to it as "a date". JJ had even almost kissed Emily that day. Some might have taken what happened between them in Paris as a sign of Emily's attraction to JJ, and the blond had briefly considered this herself during that one night they were together. But since Emily had left her alone, without saying goodbye to her face, let alone addressing her admission of her feelings, JJ had assumed since that morning that Emily didn't really care for her, and simply had been lonely and looking for company. But was Garcia right? Did Emily really feel that way about her?

The two women sat in silence, JJ utterly confused and Garcia completely amused at the whole situation.

Finally, Garcia broken the silence. She still was struggling with something that didn't quite make sense. "You know, Emily said something before she left. She said something about that she thought it was over and that she was doing what was best. Any idea what she meant?"

JJ slowly shook her head. She had no idea what the brunette had meant. The two sat in silence again, thinking over this new information.

Suddenly JJ let out a long sigh and brought her hand up to cover her mouth. She closed her eyes, "Oh no. I am such an idiot."

Garcia figured she must have missed something because she had no idea what her friend was talking about, "What? Why?"

JJ opened her eyes and looked at the older blond. Her hand was still partly covering her mouth. "I know what she meant, Pen." She removed her hand and turned to grab her things. "I have to go. I have to find her." Garcia could tell from the other woman's demeanor that the best option was just to let her go. She said the only thing that seemed appropriate, "Well, then you better go find her."

JJ got up and started to walk away from the booth. She hesitated and turned back to Garcia, realizing she lacked a vital piece of information, "I don't even know where she is."

Garcia reached into her bag and withdrew her phone. She turned the device on and rapidly began selecting options on the screen. As she did this, she gave her fair warning, "If you tell anyone about this, I will deny it ever happened. " She stopped moving her fingers and focused on the screen. "She's at her old apartment."

JJ leaned over to look at the tech analyst's phone, incredulous. The screen showed a map, with a tiny red dot labeled 'E.P.' in the center. JJ's mouth fell open. "How did you... she just got back... "

Garcia quickly turned off her phone and returned it to her bag. She casually picked up her beer and turned to look at JJ, "Well, what are you still doing here?"

JJ gave Garcia a quick hug before turning and heading towards the exit.

Emily stood looking out the picture window at the National Mall. The sun had long since set, the Capital building and Lincoln and Washington Memorials were brilliantly lit amidst the darkness. Paris may be beautiful, she thought, but there was no sight in the world like the one she was taking in at this very moment. Not as buildings were concerned, she corrected herself. Of course the only truly unparalleled sight was of JJ.

Just the thought of the blond made Emily's stomach turn, as she exhaled slowly. Having only been resurrected from the dead for a day, as far as most of the world was concerned, there was still much to be sorted out. But the one thing she felt certain of and that was that JJ was never going to forgive her for what she had done to her in Paris. Emily knew if she was in her friend's shoes, she likely would feel the same way, but she also had the benefit of knowing her intentions. A sudden knock at the door interrupted her inner dialogue.

Emily turned to just stare at the door. Who could possibly know she was here? The apartment was empty of anything material, save herself. She had sold the space and had her things removed when she 'died', but the lousy housing market had played to her fortune and luckily she was going to be able to re-acquire the property. But no one knew that but her.

She cautiously moved towards the door, unsure of what she should expect to find waiting for her on the other side. She reached the door and peered through the peep hole. To her complete shock, standing just on the other side of the wooden barrier was JJ. The blond was staring straight ahead, the only emotion on her face was one of determination.

Emily saw no way of avoiding the imminent confrontation. She turned the dead bolt and slowly opened the door. She didn't know what to say so she said nothing as her brown eyes met the blue ones of the woman standing at her door. She only opened the door halfway, standing in the open space, one hand on the door frame, one hand on the door.

The two women stared at each other for a few seconds, the longest they had done so in six months. "Can I come in?" JJ finally ventured. Her voice was soft, showing no signs of the hostility she had shown towards the brunette earlier.

Emily hesitated, "That depends. Are you going to be mean to me?" She knew she had no right to sound hurt, given what she had done to JJ, but she couldn't help it. The blond's reception to her return, no matter how deserved, had strung. At her question, Emily expected JJ to give a sarcastic response or just turn and walk away, but to her surprise the blond maintained eye contact and answered in a soft, yet firm voice, "I won't be mean, I promise."

Emily stared at JJ a few seconds longer, silently gauging her sincerity. Satisfied, she opened the door all the way and stepped into the empty apartment. JJ took the cue and entered as well, closing the door behind her. With no where else to sit, Emily stood with her back to the counter of the kitchen breakfast bar and used her arms to push herself up onto it. JJ came to stand a in the middle of the kitchen, facing her.

"Emily, I need to ask you something about Paris."

Emily's whole body tensed at this. She has been hoping to avoid a fight but JJ bringing up Paris from the start meant this now was unlikely. Instead of saying anything in return, she simply nodded.

"When you..." JJ swallowed hard, trying to determine how to best phrase what she wanted to ask. "When you left Paris to go after Doyle, did you think you were going to die?"

JJ saw Emily's shoulders deflate, as her eyes dropped to the floor. In a barely audible whisper, she answered, "Yes."

"And is that why you left without saying goodbye?"

"Yes," again, just a whisper. But then Emily raised her eyes, her voice became stronger, "But that's not the whole story."

"Oh?" JJ responded.

Emily explained, "I found out the day before that you were who the State Department was sending. I found out what hotel you'd be staying at, though I didn't know what I was going to do with the information." She was looking directly at JJ. There was five or so feet separating them, but Emily swore JJ must have been able to hear her heart beating wildly in her chest. She forcibly swallowed the lump that was forming in her throat and continued, "When I saw you, standing across the street, looking at the Eiffel Tower, not having seen me yet, I forgot about everything. About Doyle, about death, about running. Not only did I forget about it, I flat out didn't care about it anymore. All I cared about was you. Which is when I decided to leave you the note at the cafe."

Emily noticed JJ tense up. The blond said softly, "I still don't understand, Emily. I thought... when you didn't say anything... and then you left..." Her eyes went to the floor.

In one motion Emily jumped down from the counter and crossed the small kitchen. She lightly touched JJ's shoulder with one hand. When JJ didn't pull away, she used the other to touch the blond's face and raise it, so their eyes were again level. "I'm sorry. I thought I was doing what was best, protecting you. I realize now that I hurt you. Please forgive me."

JJ nodded slightly in response to this, mesmerized by how close Emily was to her, the warmth of her hand on her face. JJ started to speak but Emily beat her to it, "I thought about you every single day I was gone. Because the truth is that I do love you, JJ. I've loved you for quite some time."

JJ looked back at Emily, taking in the brunette's admission, along with the dark circles under her eyes. She reached out her hand to touch Emily's waist, immediately registering the way her hip bones jutted from her small frame. "You're so thin," she murmured, verbalizing her thoughts.

"I'm so _tired_, Jay," Emily corrected, closing her eyes.

For six months JJ had longed to hear Emily call her by this term of endearment. Without a word, she leaned in and kissed Emily lightly on the lips, her other hand going to Emily's waist and pulling her closer. Emily readily kissed her back. After a moment, JJ broke the kiss and pulled Emily's head to rest on her shoulder, her arms wrapping around her. She felt Emily lean into her, almost collapsing in her embrace.

Sensing that Emily might just fall asleep right then and there, JJ slowly pulled back, while moving her hand to take Emily's. "Come on, Em, let's go to my place. You can sleep there."

"Okay," Emily responded, relieved. For the first time in a long time she felt like she might actually be able to sleep. Part of it was knowing that JJ didn't hate her, the other part knowing that JJ would be right there next to her. She realized she had a long road ahead of her; after all, one doesn't come back from the dead and simply rejoin their life right where it left off. But, Emily realized, maybe this was a good thing, a fresh start. Her battle would be not in gaining trust, but in demonstrating to those she cared about that she trusted them as well. She was more determined than she ever had been before to win this battle, and she was going to start right here and now. With this woman, whom she adored more than anything in the world.

The two women left the apartment, hand in hand, making their way towards the cool Fall evening. Ian Doyle was dead, but Emily Prentiss was very much alive.

THE END


End file.
